13,000 China police officers in search of killer

Posted in International on 1/10/12 by .

BEIJING (AP) — Up to 13,000 police officers in China are hunting for a man suspected of a series of robberies and shootings. The hunt in Nanjing in eastern Jiangsu province centers on Zeng Kaigui. Chinese state media say Zeng is suspected to have killed a man who withdrew money from a bank and robbed him of 200,000 yuan ($31,700) cash on Friday. The reports say 13,000 officers have been mobilized in the search. Teams of police are walking through buses with a photo of Zeng, as well as checking train stations, bus stops and ports, and searching Internet cafes and hotels. The 42-year-old Zeng is suspected of killing at least six people. Calls to Nanjing police rang unanswered Tuesday.

Upon first glance, having 13,000 police officers on a manhunt for one killer, seems bat shit crazy.  However, now we must take into consideration that the population of China exceeds 1.3 billion, and there are 1.5 million total armed police personnel in the country.  My math skills fail me, but I guess given all these numbers and calculation all the ratios, China probably needs 13,000 police officers to find one killer.

Just kidding.  Thirteen THOUSAND police officers?  What kind of amateurs do they have working for their armed forces?  Send in Elliot Stabler or Derek Morgan and the job will be done.  You’re welcome.

0 comments Leave a Comment »

Blue Ivy Carter is already featured on a new Jay-Z track

Posted in Entertainment on 1/9/12 by .

After a long-awaited pregnancy, Beyonce finally gave birth on Saturday.  The news was so big that even the Huffington Post made a page exclusively for the daughter of Beyonce and hip-hop mogul, Jay-Z.

A mere two and a half days after the birth of his daughter, Blue Ivy Carter, Jay-Z has already released a track featuring his baby girl.  Entitled “Glory,” this track is in dedication to his daughter, and also features the sound of Blue Ivy’s crying in the delivery room.

 

Glory Feat. B.I.C. by RocNation

I wish my dad had recorded a rap song for me when I was born.  As if it’s not already enough that B.I.C. gets to be the daughter of the power couple, but homegirl is already an artist?  These new parents aren’t wasting any time!

At this rate, B.I.C. is going to have an E! True Hollywood Story and Behind the Music episode by the time she’s 2 years old.

0 comments Leave a Comment »

Obama doesn’t think Delonte West would make a good house guest

Posted in Sports & Activities on by .

While the rest of his Dallas Maverick teammates are hanging out at the White House today and meeting President Obama, Delonte West will be in his hometown Washington DC, but will not be joining his teammates.

Why, you might ask?  His ass is banned from the White House.  Reportedly, White House security ran a routine background check on the NBA guard and determined that due to his high-profiled arrest back in 2009, Delonte is unfit to ever step foot into the President’s home.

Let’s be honest… Barrack just needs to admit that he doesn’t want Delonte around Michelle.  Found in the fine print alongside “Delonte West is not allowed into the White House because of his highly publicized legal battles in 2009,” it clearly says Delonte West may be a threat to the well-being of Barrack and Michelle’s marriage, as West is known to have had relations with middle-aged mothers; namely Gloria James. 

Obama’s no fool.  Delonte is a lady killer with steez for days.  The proof is in his herpe-like birthmark below his lip.

0 comments Leave a Comment »

The latest and greatest in the diet supplement game…

Posted in Entertainment, Lifestyle on 1/6/12 by .

It  has come to my attention that Holly Madison, Hugh Hefner’s ex-girlfriend-turned-reality-star-vixen, now has a new diet supplement.

Is there some sort of clause in Hollywood that states, if you are famous for being famous, you must endorse a diet supplement?

A brief history:

Starting with Anna Nicole Smith and Carmen Electra, both of whom have somewhat of a resume, but are arguably famous for being famous at the end of the day, the diet pill supplement trend took off.

Next, the Kardashians obviously had to jump on that train real fast with their QuickTrim product, and who can forget Ronnie from the Jersey Shore’s Xenadrine commercials?

Now, we have Holly Madison with her NV diet pill.

Enough is enough!  None of these people need diet pills, not that any of them actually put these heart attack waiting to happen pills into their bodies anyways, I’m sure.  Don’t they realize that the only reason they are being asked to be the face of diet pills is because they’re only famous for being famous and don’t actually add anything productive to the limelight?

I have taken it upon myself to let Kimmy, Holly, Ronnie, and the rest of the fame whores know that if they were actual celebrities, they’d be doing Weight Watchers commercials.  Additionally, to all of the celebrities doing Weight Watchers commercials; if you were THAT big of a deal, you’d be doing a St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital commercial.

0 comments Leave a Comment »

7-year-old gets plastic surgery vouchers for Christmas

Posted in Lifestyle on 1/5/12 by .

As reported, Sarah Burge, otherwise known as “Human Barbie,” gave her 7-year-old daughter, Poppy, an $11,000 liposuction voucher for Christmas.  To no one’s surprise, this is not the first time Poppy has received gifts in the form of plastic surgery vouchers.  Last year Mommy Dearest gave her daughter a voucher for a boob job, which she can redeem once she is 18, if she so chooses…but we can be quite certain that she will…

I hope while Poppy is receiving tens of thousands of dollars in plastic surgery vouchers at such a tender age, that she is also getting some other sweet gifts that a 7-year-old can actually use.  Talk about lack of imagination here on ma’duke’s part; taking the easy way out and giving her daughter all these pieces of paper that she can’t even use for 10+ years.

What happens once Poppy is 18 and has used all of her vouchers?  Sarah is going to need to step up her game in the gift-giving department.

Then again, Poppy is a moron.  Clearly she could be getting some bomb ass gifts right now if her mom is dropping that kind of loot on things that can’t even be used yet.  Poppy should be asking for puppies, ponies, giraffes, etc.  Once she is 16, she should be asking for a Lamborghini, then at 18 ask for a boob job.  Get your priorities straight, sister.  Milk Mom for all she’s worth.

On a final note; the doctor in the blue scrubs can get at me.

0 comments Leave a Comment »

Facebook creeping gone wrong

Posted in College Life, Entertainment on 1/4/12 by .

We’ve all been at both ends of this; the creeper and the creeped on.

This is what happens:

As the creeper, you’re going through someone’s photos, wall, or what have you, when you accidentally like something.  This most commonly happens when you’re deep into someone’s Facebook history, thus making it blatantly obvious that you were hardcore creeping on this person.

Who is this person you’re creeping on?  This is most likely someone who you have some sort of past with.  You were in a long-term relationship with him/her, you guys used to hook up, or you accidentally hooked up one night and have never spoken since.  Good job, now they know you were getting your creep on.

Sure…you could just unlike the post or photo, but that notification has already been sent.  Even if they don’t know exactly what you were creeping on, you were still creeping.  Cue your anxiety because in your mind, they are going to think you are crazy/want to get back together/all that jazz.

CAUTION: Most Facebook creeping sessions gone wrong occur when you’re creeping via cellphone, making it extremely easy to accidentally like something.  You’ve been warned.

As the creeped on, a similar sitchiation goes down, but in the opposite direction, which is in your favor.  You get a notification that your ex significant other/ hookup buddy, or one night stand who you are now repulsed by, liked a photo of you.  Your blood boils a little bit at the very sight of their name and thumbnail photo on your notification box.  Then, you click to see what photo it is, and it’s from like 2009.

Your blood pressure slowly decreases and your immediate thought is HAHA! JOKES ON YOU, SUCKER!  This is instant gratification in that you now know they were checking your shit out, and liking it, nonetheless.  Who cares if this was a case of the aforementioned “accidental ‘like’ via cellphone?”  The point of the matter is, they were creeping, and you have won.

0 comments Leave a Comment »

Huge pillow fight? Count us in!

Posted in Cool Videos, Entertainment on 12/29/11 by .

These Chinese people may actually be on to something.

For everyone who isn’t lucky enough to work here at StudentCity with the best coworkers, managers, and bosses in the game, I’m sure you wouldn’t hate scribbling down the name of your superiors onto a pillow and beating the bag out of the air, or whatever else you may come in contact with.

Remember this next semester when finals come around.

Finals ended not too long ago but back in college I strongly believe that my experience with exams and papers would’ve gone a lot smoother had I written out the names of my professors and topics that I was stuffing my brain with onto something that I then used to hit things with.  A pillow with SHAKESPEARE written across it would’ve eased my mind for that exam.  I might’ve even taken the pillow fight a step further and burned the damn pillow afterwards, after also having stabbed it repeatedly.

Anyways…even if this is not done in an organized manner, I encourage that next semester when exams and papers are stressing you out, gather even just one friend or roommate, get a soft pillow, throw on your favorite music, and go crazy.  Hell, I’d definitely even do this by myself.

One suggestion…

Stowe any breakable items in a safe place for your pillow fight party.

0 comments Leave a Comment »

The chronic Facebook messager

Posted in Entertainment on 12/28/11 by .

Some people just can’t take a hint. 

Everyone has that one person who tries to chat with them on Facebook on at least a weekly basis, and you never give them the time of day.  They are probably a member of the opposite sex, and you sort of feel bad because they may be virtually harmless, but when that chat box pops up and they have said “hey,” you don’t even as much as say hi back.  You figure that if you don’t answer then this will only be a one-time occurrence.  You’re thinking, they’ll definitely get the hint and I won’t have to awkwardly ignore them again…

Fast forward to four days.  You are again faced with a “hey” from this same individual.  What the hell?  Did they seriously not get it before when I didn’t respond to them and also never signed off of Facebook?  Maybe I will just say something like, “hey, sorry I’ve been busy lately, what’s up?”  Let’s face it, you have no intention of actually saying this, nor is this true.  Whatever.  Once I don’t answer for the second time in four days, they’ll definitely never message me again.

A week later…”hey.”  Are you friggen kidding me? 

0 comments Leave a Comment »

Pittsburgh teens post Facebook photos after robbery

Posted in Entertainment on 12/27/11 by .

First we have the case of the New York principal under fire for posting a risque photo on Facebook, so we all know how I feel about people posting ridiculous and incriminating things on the internet.

Now there’s these four Pittsburgh teens who robbed a local corner store and posted pictures of themselves with cash and other various stolen property onto Facebook.  Not only do these photos not belong on Facebook, but these photos should not exist at all!  I guess the cops can thank Isaiah and his buddies for doing half of their job for them, by photographing the evidence.

Honestly, where did these guys think these photos were going to land them?  This is the exact opposite of gaining some street cred.

I thought that I had a lot of great laughs reading the statuses that some of my Facebook friends post.  When I go on my de-friending sprees, there are a select few people who I do not delete based on the fact that their statuses and photos are internet gold.  Even better than these nonsense posts are usually the comments that go along with them.  I don’t care that we haven’t seen each other since 7th grade, your public baby daddy bashing is my entertainment.

I can’t even imagine what the captions and comments were like on these photos.  I’m sure they were sheer genius.

0 comments Leave a Comment »

Christmas wouldn’t be the same without the NBA

Posted in Sports & Activities on 12/23/11 by .

This Christmas Day’s NBA schedule includes:

Celtics @ Knicks, Bulls @ Lakers, Magic @ Thunder, Clippers @ Warriors, and my personal favorite, HEAT @ MAVERICKS.

Merry Christmas, Miami; here’s the Mavs’ 2011 Championship banner in your face.

0 comments Leave a Comment »
First3456Last

Facebook

Categories

Archives